Yeah. I killed it. I’ve stopped reading love stories and watching romantic movies since… well, I don’t quite remember. It was somewhere between giving up on love and recommitting my life to Christ. It started as utter exasperation at how Hollywood depicts love or romance. It eventually became a way to keep myself from yearning for a romantic relationship (rather effective, I have to say) and to maintain a healthy view of love. No ridiculous expectations of someone coming to sweep me off my feet with bold declarations and fancy gifts. Because talk is cheap and money can’t buy you love.
What’s wrong with romance? Nothing – if it stems from genuine care. The problem is we’ve become less sensitive to the latter and focus on the former. Men can learn how to build romance. Flowers, chocolates, moonlight serenades – they’ve got it down to a system. But commitment? That’s kind of hard to come by. We forget that it’s one of the key ingredients in a loving, secure relationship. We ladies get all excited about getting attention and gifts that we forget ask the important questions. Does he love the Lord? Does he love others? If the answer is yes – then perhaps this man is ready for a serious, committed relationship. We must be mindful, however, of discerning between what looks like love and real love that comes from Christ. It’s relatively easy to have a list of things he should or shouldn’t do. It is much, much harder to determine why a man acts the way he does. Just as faith without works is dead, words without love is meaningless.
1 Corinthians 13:1
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.
Whenever I consider a man, I take note of how he deals with other people. He can me a real gentleman to me, but if he is rude to the waiter or the parking attendant – he gets written off. Immediately. If a man can’t show respect and love to ordinary people, what makes you think he’ll give you respect and love that you deserve?
So, yes. Any man who wants to win my heart will have a tough time going at it.
Romance is dead. Sacrificial love is the peg. A love like Christ’s.